In time, I had to come face to face with self-acceptance. I had to accept that this is the way I am, but there had to be other factors as well. After sleepless nights and engaged conversations with a few friends who share the same struggle, I managed to come up with four factors. Perhaps if I could overcome the factors, things would be different- I would be different.
Evolving of things
When we employ activities like yoga, lending a hand at the charity center or journaling, we are prone to changes. Instinctively, this might raise a conflict with a desire for a good change; the kind that has urged us to begin in the first place. Change is frightening. Change is about venturing into another foreign place; going out of our comfort zone. Change is inevitable and like it or not, we have to go through changes.
Discovery of things
Self-understanding can be misguiding at times, you might think that you've delved into all, and then you flip a page and realize that there are thousands of words you haven’t read and even more pages unread. You can’t tell if the story is going to get better and it feels safer to just leave it untouched. The most valuable part of self-growth is self-acceptance. When we take a step into discovering new things, our defenses are at risk and we might learn things about us that may not be to our liking. The process requires us to accept ourselves and learn to love the things about us we thought we would never like.
Being kind to ourselves
To begin with, being nice to ourselves is a complex subject, some might not admit this but, we subconsciously believe that we don’t deserve to spend time and be lovely to ourselves. As an abstruse theory, it’s a no brainer: everyone deserves their own kindness. When was the last time you took the time to get to know yourself in depth? Too often, we tell our friends, who were having a hard time that they deserve that without realizing that we need that as well.
Confidence in our routines
Self-doubt is the enemy of self-growth. My mind can suddenly turn skeptical and belittle my painting and journaling and says “Aren't you above this so-called artsy nonsense?” I have denied the voice countless times, but it always finds a way to get to me. Gaining faith in a routine is difficult- especially ones that are slow and may not seem fruitful at times. It may seem like we've poured all our efforts and what we get in return isn't worth all that. But there is progress- slow, yes, but there is progress. We don’t always see major changes in a day, but try to look back on a year or two ago, the change is massive.